Obama Designates December as National Awareness Awareness Month

obama-presserPresident Obama issued a presidential proclamation yesterday, designating December as National Awareness Awareness Month, responding to a glaring need across the nation for Americans to “have a firm grasp on what is taking place in certain places at any given time, taking the time to grasp the given details that are developing all the time.”

Awareness awareness month will seek to inform people that yes, events are happening, and yes they are affecting everyone, not just these people over there, or those people over here, or here are their people with their problems, and there are our people and there are problems, but we are all people here wherever we are and whatever are our problems.

A recent Gallup poll indicated that an alarming 72% of White middle-class Native Hawaiian Americans “weren’t aware”, 74% of non-white Black Hispanic Non-resident Aliens “didn’t know”, and 79% of Hispanic non-Black African-Pacific Islanders “had no idea”.  68% of Native Alaskan-American Indians claimed they “had a pretty good handle on things” but it was later confirmed that they in fact did not. Likewise Asian Latino non-Hispanic White-blacks had “almost no brain activity whatsoever regarding the thing that went down a little bit ago over there”. Nearly all participants surveyed became defensive when asked simple questions such as “Who?” “When?”, “What?”, “Why?” or “Whore?”, and were unable to offer a coherent answer.

Following is Obama’s statement from yesterday’s press conference:

“We want people to have the right information because information is their right. Not having the right information is not the right answer. The answer is right now and we want it now, right away. Things are always changing and changing things always happen all around. If we don’t wake up and sieze the day, we’re going to wake up and see that the day is over. Wake up. All of it. Things like circumstances, acts, cases, situations, occasions, matters, incidences, accidences, and experiences. Gone. We must be always aware, never neglectful, continually cognizant, and never not know no new news. Never. It all starts with awareness awareness and can go literally anywhere from there. There is no limit to what we can do if we stand together and remain aware of our awareness. We aren’t going to allow things to happen without them allowing us to know about them happening. We want details and we want them within our desired timeframe, whatever that may be. We’ll look ahead in anticipation and embrace the things that are as if we knew all along that what we have is inside of ourselves and not somewhere else like over there or behind that tree or underneath a thing like this. This is the time. This is the place. There is no place like this time. We are the ones to create this future and that future will happen right after this.”

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One thought on “Obama Designates December as National Awareness Awareness Month

  1. this article definitely enhanced my awareness of my lack of awareness and I will definitely be aware of observing awareness awareness month whenever I become aware that it is still December. Thanks for the excellent wordplay and for bringing many a smile and frequent guffaws to this delightfully unaware soul!

    Like

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